Blinded by the slight

and so my love, this is almost the end.
i said, the end!
an exclamation point for you to understand.
why can't you  let them go?
the feeling, the air
the freedom, despair

Turn back time

[ if i could go back
  i'd choose nowhere
  i'd want nothing
  but the time when i suck my thumb,
  would be good. ]

Let it tell. Uncover

You don't have to say thank you to show you care. After the long time battle we had. Seems like silence is all that we have. For you find comfort and easy in that. But i need something real in my head. Say it loud say it clear so i can feel a glimpse of amity. I want proof, whether a sign nor a perform. As long as not another explicit message like you used to perform. I'm tired of feeling, bored of imagining, i want a shocking wave blasting surround me until it reaches the core of my alveoli.

Once lived

-i once lived-

Lets talk about death will you.
With every tears, by every pray
What is death to you?

I've seen death in a way human does.
I've seen a smile before they took a life
I've seen minute of pain, right after shocking accident
I've seen nothing but they just suddenly passed away

A good question once a friend ever asked,
"better be in pain, or seeing your loved one in pain?"
For we all will experience the equal pain,
there's nothing.

Let's talk about death will you,
how's your life going?

Loop & Repeat & ViceVersa

and so my love, this is almost the end. i said, the end! an exclamation point for you to understand. enough months of assumption and presumption that has successfully brought back the rain. or nice dream and imagination that have made my heartbeat run to the furthest place it had made. and now seems like the hope and sorrow are put back to where it belong. over there. to the first time i found them. wrapped in thin metal armor and some ivory leaves.

then so my love, i'd like to chew a nice strawberry menthol gum right now. while watching the clock clocking clicking counter clockwise. and oh, a hot english breakfast mixed lychee Dilmah Tea, with a pour of one third spoon of yellow sugar. and sit over here. watching. starting. all over again.

let's move on and repeat the future.

What lies beneath the ocean

and then the reality sang, about an unfortunate coinsidence.

"what lies beneath the mind, of a boy?"

"what boy?" i asked

"the one you've been wanting for", it replied

speechless as my mind was erased by tons of lightning

"for i have no idea, i hand it out to you.

what lies beneath the mind, of a girl?"

"what girl?" asked it, gently

"then one you've been asking for", i replied

Wasted bastard

i
feel
wasted

...

bastard.

Untitled001

please go
enough to see you so
and come back tomorrow
three knocks shall follow
oh, i miss you already now

quick leave
can't help much longer please
because i can't see you to much
afraid to lost appetite
memory of you is enough


++++

i was going to make a song out of these but guess i'm to tone-blinded.
bad taste of song making. :P Anyone care to help? :D

If only hse kan wush

hse can not wish for an alligator to be friendly
hse can not wish for stars to shine only for hse
hse can not wish for a certain miracle that's only hse can see
hse can not be as selfish as hse is here

A love that will last

i love it when you silent
and there's no one else around
because you are the only one
that stand stood behind

i love it when you speak no word
and the smell of your plain parfume
and your sleek smooth skin
i'd be delightful just to taste a bit

i love it when you shut your mouth
and also your eyes
and also your heart
and oh, your mind to

because your body is all mine
even that your soul has left behind
oh i love it when i can owe you forever,
my dear lovely man.

This side is better

this side is better

“Sometimes, it’s fun to do the opposite truth. Is that a truth, anyway?”

. . .

if yesterday was a lie,
and tomorrow won't be the truth
then what's worth living?

She said no

she said no

“Can you trust a heartless when it shows its heart?
Apparently no one would understand the heartless but the girl.
She’s the one who can see a heart beneath a heartless surface.
Yet a ‘No’ given not because a hearted heartless look,
doesn’t look exactly like any other hearted creature,
but she doesn’t know for sure;
is a hearted heartless look
has the same heart as she has?”

One and the lost of its only one

“a heartless one, you say?”, ask one to another.
“yes, for the third time, yes. .”
“but one could never imagine having none instead of one. How could that possibly be?”
“believe me, it happened long ago before one ever realized. .”
“that..?”
“that one has lost it’s one and only heart.”

Coincidence? Is that so?

One coincidence
In a collusive way
Well planned

Is it good or bad?
Is it right or wrong?

What is more important?
The result
Or
The process?

Maybe a coincidence
Pure coincidence

Yeah
I like that.

Ghea dan seseorang

seseorang menghapus Ghea

dari phonebooknya
dari daftar teman di Yahoo Messengernya
dari list friends dalam segala account internetnya
dari coretan-coretan kecil yang ada di notesnya
dari semuanya
dari hidupnya

seseorang mencoba menghilangkan Ghea

dari segala memori hidupnya
dari segala ucapannya
dari segala seluk beluk pikiran di otaknya
dari segala sisi dunianya
dari dia

seseorang berusaha membuat Ghea tiada

dari pandangannya
dari ingatannya
dari segala suara yang ditangkap oleh telinganya
dari bau badannya
dari lingkungannya

seseorang ingin Ghea hilang dari dirinya







seseorang menyibukkan dirinya
sesorang berusaha menepis keberadaan Ghea
seseorang tak ingin melihat, mendengar, atau pun merasakan keberadaan Ghea.



seseorang sedang dilanda kesusahan

semakin dia berusaha, Ghea semakin adasemakin dia berusaha, Ghea semakin terlihatsemakin dia berusaha, Ghea semakin kuat

Ghea semakin tertancap dalam pikirannya, seiring dia mencoba


suatu saat Ghea mendatanginya seperti biasa
seseorang berusaha menahan dirinya
seseorang tak ingin Ghea mengetahui dia
mengetahui perasaan dia sebenarnya

semakin seseorang menghindari Ghea
semakin aneh pola tingkah lakunya
semakin Ghea merasa seseorang menjadi aneh


terkadang seseorang menyesali hal itu
bersembunyi dalam bisu
hanya mampu memandang pilu





sampai sekarang seseorang tetap berusaha mengubur Ghea
hingga keruh air mata
hingga tak ada lagi ruang di hatinya
yang penuh akan gerusan Ghea